Player "Marp Tarpton" should be banned

[AFullCodpiece]

Mods,

I have a serious problem with a thread posted by a person called "Marp Tarpton" (that is a ridiculous name, btw). The thread was called "A Dialogue on the Penis". I don't have any problems with a thread full of penis pictures....quite the opposite, in fact. My issue is that I've become obsessed with the picture entitled "Troll Penis". Is it real? Why didn't the photographer include something in the pic as a reference for the size? Where would it fall on the "Average Troll Penis" (ATP) scale? How did it feel in the hands? It is all I can think about and it is causing me IRL distress, which is unacceptable.

Please rectify,

AFC

[Brego]

Don't you like it?It was a perfect thread !!!You posted so many tears about a one thread but watching at your avatar i can say it's almost same ****.

[saltmummy]

Don't you like it?It was a perfect thread !!!You posted so many tears about a one thread but watching at your avatar i can say it's almost same ****.

[MarpTarpton]

I apologize. I will contact the curator immediately to have him send additional images if possible. For reference, I would say it was slightly larger than average in both girth and possible length; as it was flaccid when preserved this is difficult to huge. It is also worth noting it was very dirty with what seemed to be bits of food caught in the public hairs.

[saltmummy]

It is also worth noting it was very dirty with what seemed to be bits of food caught in the public hairs.

Either it's a very messy eater, or people have been getting their faces a "bit" too close to it.

[jcwilk]

Everyone knows that trolls first soften their food by perforating it prior to consumption.

[AFullCodpiece]

For reference, I would say it was slightly larger than average in both girth and possible length; as it was flaccid when preserved this is difficult to huge. It is also worth noting it was very dirty with what seemed to be bits of food caught in the public hairs.

I was more concerned with heft, as opposed to length and girth. Like would it feel like a small bag of wet sand in the hand?


Also "bits of food".....I'm absolute diamonds.

AFC

P.S. How many "Troll Penis Fanclubs" currently exist in Salem and which ones should I join?

[saltmummy]

How many "Troll Penis Fanclubs" currently exist in Salem and which ones should I join?

I don't think there are any, maybe you could start one? You could do hazing rituals to sort out new members from the chaff.

[Reviresco]

I heard trolls were hunted to extinction for their penises.