I Slaughtered Some Pirates (Now with 30% more English)

[pistolshrimp]

This is like a bad soap opera. Can't keep up with this ****.

Someone needs to get their story straight here. Maybe then it would be interesting. As of now it's just another **** pirate post that is just as much a struggle to read as it is to keep up with what's actually happening.

For the good of Salem I've translated our latest Pirate Thread.

Whitepoint: Today I came home and to my surprise and consternation found that there were 4 assassins, passed out on the floor of my home. I had been preparing for this day and it has finally come. I quickly dispatched them. All asses were kicked, thoroughly.

They must have been sent by my old ex BFF Ammaboss.

Amaboss: Once I called Whitepoint friend, we lived together, shared colewort, I even helped him fake his own death.



But he slandered my name and now I call him Enemy. Indeed It was I who sent the assassins after him. I'm not sure how they failed so hard...

Whitepoint: When we lived together he ate all my food was constantly trying to mooch money off me. My thoughts quickly turned towards murder.

Even then, when you had fallen into a coma, and I stood above you, contemplating ending your sad, sad life, I took pity on you. And this is how you repay me?



Ammaboss: No, it was you who fell into a coma, and I stood over your frail body, imagining how easy it would be to reach out and crush what remaining life you clung to, but, as if, even in your deep sleep, you could sense my intentions, you cried, "I WANT TO LIVE." And I, being the romantic I am, let you live.



Whitepoint: SPIES AND THIEVES. I said no such thing.

Surely your Evil Twin Brother Ssobamma will set the story straight.

Ammabos: Shows what you know, he isn't even my Twin, but rather my split personality. That's why we look so much alike. And he can verify everything I said. Let me go get him.



Evil Twin/ Split Personality Brother: Everything Ammaboss says is true. Buy my Colewort.

Ammaboss: You guys believe me him right?

*Edit* Pirates may or may not have been killed.

[jwhitehorn]

Thank you very much for this. I couldn't be bothered to read that other **** thread.

Chief PeePooKaKa
MM Tribe

[Ass_Kraken]

You sir a story teller of the highest caliber.

[alprice]

Yes, I agree. This was the shiz!!! A good read especially when I am at work.

[Rydersowl]

Holy ****. It's like night and day. I give this thread my full endorsement and nominate Pistolshrimp for the translation of all future pirate posts. Whitepoint and Ammaboss, please forward your correspondences to this Forum sanctioned poster.

[AmmaBoss]

yea that kinda what happen but my bro is real tho ask whitepoint i would post his name but he don't want to get into this confusion.
and i can assure you that whitepoint did not kill any pirates. he kill 3 alts and some guy i met who agree to kill him then log out on his claim .

[Rydersowl]

yea that kinda what happen but my bro is real tho ask whitepoint i would post his name but he don't want to get into this confusion.
and i can assure you that whitepoint did not kill any pirates. he kill 3 alts and some guy i met who agree to kill him then log out on his claim .

Nonono. Please send it to Pistol. Let him make you a Jamestown legend.

[RuneNL]

Bravo bravo!

P.S. I hope that extra 30% English doesn't tighten my nickers!

[niko8]

So, today pirates with EmmaBoss help find out the location of Whitepoint. It was me who was sending alts to his base. He was baking the pies all the evening there. Probably preparing for pirates
I have full inventory of different evidences for Whitepoint. So it doesn't take a big effort to kill him again as the base is a crap.

[ZtyX]

yea that kinda what happen but my bro is real tho ask whitepoint i would post his name but he don't want to get into this confusion.
and i can assure you that whitepoint did not kill any pirates. he kill 3 alts and some guy i met who agree to kill him then log out on his claim .

Did you kin that guy? What was his name?