Pledges: x7
Claeyt Status: Alive
Balance as of 11/17/2013
Greetings Good Burghers of Salem,
Recently I have traveled to the scores of burnt down Hovels and Steadings dotted across the colony of Plymouth and I was horrified to find the current Austerity Measures enforced, simply were not working to help raise this once thriving metropolis out of the ashes and ruins of today. Everywhere I went, I only found stagnant water, diseased rats and the occasional retched band of ragged vagabonds. Seeing full scale the utter destruction of the New World, I immediately dispatched correspondences to my contacts back in the Hudson Bay Trading Company about what could be done to remedy the situation. For, if left unchecked, hunger and pollution might spread and forever take hold and corrupt this New World.
A meeting was arranged in Jamestown at the behest of the Governor, Lord Darwoth, that we might discuss the trivialities that are so rampant in the Lodges among the good brothers. Had socialism truly come to the New World? What could be done to stave off this monster? Do men actually believe that creating debts out of thin air truly prospers? We were unanimous in our outcry, that socialism and austerity measures were nothing more than taxation without representation, and we would secretly work to undermine any attempts to bring fruit of such labors.
Out of this, the Serverwide Balance Enforcement Programs were drafted on behalf of the Good Burghers, to ensure a future where no one is left behind, everyone has a head start, there is no debt, and most of all, we may finally end hunger in the tribe.
How it works
*Effective immediately, jwhitehorn's current post count will be the base amount added to the Serverwide Balance Enforcement Programs Surplus Account.
*Every man and/or woman who pledges, will have an account created out of complete thin air, and deposited 100s! Anyone who links in their signature as well to this topic, will have an additional 100s deposited to said account! The sky is truly the limit.
*Each and every day I will compound the total post count of jwhitehorn and multiply it by the total number of pledges, plus the balance of pledged account balances, these funds will then be transferred to balance the books, that reflect any current and outstanding debts now held by the Good Burghers, and the remainder donated to ending hunger in the Tribe!
*Upon 25 Pledges, or the sacrificing of Claeyt, I will install the Roll Over plan, where 10% of the remaining balance before being donated, will be automatically rolled over and applied to the next daily balance.
Who can Pledge?
Anyone not starving or broke, anyone with the willpower and drive to succeed and provide for themselves, and anyone against socialism.
Can I Pledge more?
No. Simply pledging support in the form of a post is all that is needed. I am the keeper of the books and will make all necessary arrangements on your behalf. If you wish to further the cause, it is highly recommend you troll jwhitehorn daily, raise discussions with him daily, anything in an attempt to drive up his post count! You should petition your government for a redress should jwhitehorn be banned, as this is very bad for the good and stability of the realm! We need jwhitehorn, for he is truly the only way out of his own mess.
Can I sacrifice Claeyt?
Yes. And anyone who provides proof of having done so, I will begin the Roll Over program, see above for details.
Am I safe if I pledge?
Safe? Friends, what is not safe with prosperity? The word itself literally screams security!
How do you fight thin air policies?
With thin air policies of course!
So my Good Burghers, gird up your loins, and pledge today! Together we can thrive, and end the national debt, and once and for all, end hunger in the Tribe! So come, and let us balance the books!
With Regards,
Shill the Thief
