It all started when the Chief was asleep in his TeePee. He was tossing and turning as if being summoned by a power greater than himself when all of a sudden he was ripped from his dreams of Earthworms and he found himself in the the presence of The Great Spirit himself! The Chief immediate looked up with pride and said
"Great Spirit! Why have you come to me in my deepest slumber! What is it that you need from your people?"
The Great Spirit said nothing. Just simply burned an image into his brain and vanished. The Chief, startled, quickly arose and pondered the image that The Great Spirit shared with him.
The Chief quickly gathered his braves! He explained to them that The Great Spirit clearly wishes that the Pagans who would so foolishly offer him town-ship be destroyed! So the Tribe scattered to the wilderness searching far and wide for this "Mathers Vineyard".
After much searching a Brave came home and reported that the squatters had been located and the Tribe quickly marched to the location.
They began by doing what they do best.
The Chief then called out
"GREAT SPIRIT! We have done what you have asked of us once again. May we please leave these Squatters to reflect on their wrongdoings? If we may be released of our duties please let us know. If you do not respond we will understand that you wish us to take all of their belongings!"
*Silence*.
The hearts of the Tribe sunk as the realization sunk in that The Great Spirit wished for all their worldly possessions be ripped from their claims.
But just then a villager of Mathers Vineyard LOGS IN to witness the liberation of his goods in action!
And he quickly engages Rocky in combat. Rocky's instincts immediately kicked into action and he ran like the wind!
The Chief then once again called out!
"GREAT SPIRIT! These squatters know not what they did nor what they do! Just as the puppy shall occasionally shat on the carpet, and just as the manatee shall occasionally be striked by a boat propeller, the Squatter is but a lesser life-form who knows not the consequences of his actions! They are logging every minute and we are becoming outnumbered Great Spirit! Please allow me to spare these peoples! Your silence will be understood as a verdict of death for them!"
*Silence*
"DAMMIT" Rocky explained
"What is it young brave" The Chief Responded
"This is totally...WHATEVER.... every time we KO somebody why are YOU the one that always gets to scalp them. I never get to have any fun! Life is just not fair!" Rocky cried out
"Fine you take this one" replied the Chief
"thats why...." The Chief responded.
Just then the last remaining villager of Mathers Vineyard attempts to bargain for the savior of of the last claim of the city. Diplomacy begins.
But then the person says the magic words. And despite an iron will and amazing displays of self-restraint even the Chief and his noble principles is not able to hold back with the promise of earthworms on the table.
It is at that time that the Mayor of this fine town "AlicePorta" begins negotiations.
But it is quickly realized that she is a bad mayor and all negotiations were terminated.
The Chief slowly walked away from the city of Mathers' Vineyard. The aroma of burning farmers houses still present in the air. A small tear rolled down his cheek as he whispered.....
"As you asked of me Great Spirit......Just as you asked....."
P.S. Seveneless. Perhaps you would like to use this screenshot as a "how not to build defenses" of all the ways to cut corners in these lands... Coal is certainly not a good one to cut.
Chief PeePooKaKa
MM Tribe
De Furtivis Literarum Notis by Giovanni Battista della Porta
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