Salem Movie Reviews: The Last Survivors

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Re: Salem Movie Reviews: A Field In England

Postby Tammer » Mon Mar 30, 2015 2:54 pm

Children of Men (2006)

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Tags: Witchcraft, Disease, Server Wipe

An unfixed bug prevents players from making new pilgrims and chaos erupts when JC announces a server wipe. Our Heros have a solution but must journey to JC's yacht because they have been banned from posting on the forums. Unfortunately, Bad Guys have infiltrated their group and kill one of Our Heros. The Bad Guys try to trap Our Heros with some locked cupboards, but they escape to a friendly hermit's base, a lone player still growing and baking while the world burns. The hermit sacrifices himself and gives directions to Our Heros to meet a shady guy at an abandoned base. The shady guy agrees to party Our Heros to get them into a newb base by the ocean. The Bad Guys attack and Our Heros narrowly escape once again to make it to JC's yacht. However, one of Our Heros has been witched and dies from a bleed because he has no tourniquet.

Combat: Mostly kills from treachery, standard fare for Salem. The battle for the newb base at the end reveals their poor base design.

Crafting: None. Tear up your clothes and make a damn tourniquet!

Crime!: Arson, Battery, Murder, Witchcraft. Our Heros have apparently left some scents before the movie starts since the Bad Guys have no trouble tracking them.

Gluttony: There is a scene with some end gamer and his Feasting Table, but mostly the action is on the run with no time for leveling up.

Base Design: Hermit's base is nice, compact with lots of pot. The newb base is a disaster, with decaying buildings and walls in random places, where nobody can be trusted.

Would Recommend?: Yes.
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Re: Salem Movie Reviews: A Field In England

Postby hitori » Mon Mar 30, 2015 3:32 pm

Tammer
uh, i actually want to watch it now
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Re: Salem Movie Reviews: A Field In England

Postby Kandarim » Mon Mar 30, 2015 3:45 pm

This thread is so full of win, I might re-watch children of men.
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Re: Salem Movie Reviews: Children of Men

Postby pistolshrimp » Mon Mar 30, 2015 7:13 pm

Tammer wrote:Children of Men (2006)


Yes! Your review works beautifuly with that movie.
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Re: Salem Movie Reviews: Children of Men (by Tammer)

Postby Claeyt » Mon Mar 30, 2015 11:48 pm

:lol:
jorb wrote:(jwhitehorn) you are an ungrateful, spoiled child


As the river rolled over the cliffs, my own laughing joy was drowned out by the roaring deluge of the water. The great cataract of Darwoth's Tears fell over and over endlessly.
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Re: Salem Movie Reviews: Children of Men (by Tammer)

Postby TotalyMeow » Tue Mar 31, 2015 1:51 am

These are great. 'There Will Be Blood' might make a good review.
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Re: Salem Movie Reviews: Children of Men (by Tammer)

Postby Cheena » Tue Mar 31, 2015 9:29 am

TotalyMeow wrote:These are great. 'There Will Be Blood' might make a good review.


Well we wait you to do it then :mrgreen:
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Re: Salem Movie Reviews: Children of Men (by Tammer)

Postby Yes » Tue Mar 31, 2015 11:42 am

Do "A Return to Salem's Lot" (cause it has salem in the name), it also has Tara Reid in it
(a person who plays online games since the 1980s about salem) laywn wrote:I have never seen anything so down right dirty!
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Re: Salem Movie Reviews: Children of Men (by Tammer)

Postby pistolshrimp » Tue Mar 31, 2015 7:56 pm

Updated with Black Death (2010).

@ Tammer do you want me to put your whole Review on the main page in the spoiler tag or keep the link to your post?

TotalyMeow wrote:These are great. 'There Will Be Blood' might make a good review.


For the time being I'm going to stick to movies that seem more related to Salem, but I agree this would probably make an awesome review, I hope someone does it, otherwise I'll have to make an exception.
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Re: Salem Movie Reviews: Black Death

Postby Potjeh » Tue Mar 31, 2015 8:02 pm

pistolshrimp wrote:Gluttony: We watch in horror as our party gluttons a large session composed entirely of Bread. I don't think a single bile is gained.

:lol:
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