This fine evening, I set out in search of the criminal Lalliath on the orders of Chief Biddas. After a long sail up the coast and a trek over many mountain ranges (or a 40-minute jaunt N-NW of Boston) my diligence paid off, as I came across the fiend's stronghold. Alas, it seemed nigh-impenetrable:
I attempted to breach, but failed - I began to lose hope, when I noticed a scrawled sign outside their walls...
The inspirational words brought me to new heights of ingenuity - Binks had been apprenticing under The Wizard Khaztropix for some time now, and so I called upon him for aid.
"Binks," cried I, "I require your aid!"
"Call me Great Shaman Binks," he replied
"Great Shaman Binks, I require your aid!"
"Shut up Dan I am playing Diablo III it is way hardcore. Salem is not hardcore."
"Salem is hardcore!"
"Is not!"
"Is too!"
"No it's not you can't even raid in Salem anymore it's stupid"
"You can so raid we stole a bunch of stuff from KSCity tonight!"
"Yeah but they left their gates open and didn't build braziers"
"Well, yeah... but now I'm going to kill Lalallaeth!"
"Lalliath?"
"Lalleleth?"
"Lalliath."
"Whatever, she's going down!"
"So why haven't you done it yet? Talk is cheap Dan"
"Well she has a wall around her town..."
"So you can't kill her."
"Well, I was wondering if you knew any magic spells to remove walls"
"Oh right, I do! Hold on let me just play Diablo III for another hour or so"
An hour or so passed.
"Ok, here we go!"
With a rattling of bones and cackling of crows and then... more... rattling of bones, Binks brought the wall down! I quickly rushed in, summoned the criminal online, and 80 or so Blood later, she was brought to Justice:
v/r,
"Dangerous" Dan Dabrowski
